Thursday, June 19, 2008

Black Widows versus Beauties.

One day, you’re gonna look at the past...

You’re going to wonder:

What the fuck did I do?

How could I possibly have been so ignorant?


You’re going to look at the girls:

Those bitches who broke your heart

Without a second thought.
Those black widows who stole your soul

Without blinking.

You’ll regret those girls, intensely. 


But even more-so:

You’re going to remember the ones you walked by;

The ones you treated as dispensable. 

Disposable.

The women who loved you for you.

The beauties who weren’t as flashy,

Who weren’t as dramatic,

Who weren’t drawn in such bold colors.


And you will feel this cut to your soul

Much, much more than the ones who hurt you.

Regret and remorse will overtake you

At the point you come to realize

The deep, deep pit you’ve locked yourself in.


It’s certain you will run from that pit,

Falling into the one next door.

Until you learn

And acknowledge your depravity.

You may change,

But the house is betting you will not.

And the house ALWAYS wins.


How do I know, you ask?

Because you look into the mirror,

Studying yourself deeply,

And both you and I see...


Me.


But at least I'm aware of my depravity.

8 comments:

Melissa said...

Is this like the uncut version of your recent facebook note?;) or is it separate?

Such brutal, beautiful glimpses you give us...

Jeanne said...

Haha, it's definitely for only a few people's eyes. I'm pretty sure you're the only one who reads here, and it's on Myspace but for my private readers.

And... well... they are certainly about the same thing, but separately written.

Boys. Stupid, stupid boys.

Melissa said...

Stupid, stupid boys like ones that distract you and make you tense up on occasion....?

I like this stuff. A lot. It's raw and honest.

Keep 'em coming.

Jeanne said...

Sadly, some of my best writings are about this guy. Heh. At least he's inspiring :)

Melissa said...

p.s.
So I had this really weird dream last night... you were mad at me about my opinion on something (can't remember what) and you wrote me a 10 point bulleted list of why I was wrong and also a horrible person.

I think it just means I've been blogging too much lately. haha:)

Melissa said...

Sara Bareilles said in this interview that pretty much half of the songs off her "Little Voice" album (that I think just went multi-platinum) was pretty much inspired by one ex boyfriend.

always the silver lining:)

as long as we're not mercenary about it like John Mayer, I think we're good;)

Jeanne said...

Haha, that's hilarious - your dream, I mean.

Yes, too much bulleting and blogging.

Mac tells me that bulleting isn't a word. Hmph.

Anyhow, see you sooooooooooooooon!!

انجين محمد said...


شركة مكافحة حشرات بجازان
عملينا العزيز لديك أفضل شركة مكافحة حشرات بجازان التي تقدم لك أجود أنواع المبيدات الحشرية التي تساعد في إبادة كافة أنواع الحشرات بأحجامها وأنواعها المختلفة سوء كانت قوارض أو زواحف أو طائرة، من خلال حرص الشركة الدائم على توفير أجود أنواع المبيدات الحشرية، التي أثبتت فعاليتها القوية في إبادة الحشرة فور رش المبيد الحشري، وأيضاً حرصها على استخدام أجود وأحدث الآلات والمعدات المستخدمة التي نستطيع من خلالها الوصول لأدق الأماكن التي يكون من الصعب الوصول إليها بالطرق التقليدية، فعند التعامل معنا قل وداعاً لكافة أنواع الحشرات بأحجامها المختلفة بأفضل التقنيات الحديثة.

About Me

My photo
I live amongst the dragons and the warriors of the 21st century. I surround myself with both the peasants, the aristocrats; the knights and the maidens. For a long time (now quite in the past), I wove the structure of my life around the mold others saw for me. I've since learned to live for God and myself. Freedom comes and goes as I remember this lesson of mine. But my life is MY life: a series of events and remembering such. And this, this beautiful montage, is why I wake up every morning. God willing.