Saturday, June 14, 2008

Gone, Baby, Gone.

Some people are too nice.
Some, too mean.
Where is the middle?
Where is the understanding?
Why does the phone ring in the middle of the night?

It's ringing for you,
And it's never good news:
Come to tell you of the world,
Of the evil within.

Live another day, my love.
Hope for something better.
It will come.
But it may not be in this life.

For eternity is not yet.
Eternity feels so.... so far away.
It almost seems. Unattainable?
But - we're told it's worth it.
In our fast food society, can we hold out?
Can we wait for what's better??

Thank you for your strength.
Without it, I would be nothing.
Thank you for your beauty.
Without it, I would be lost.
Thank you for your wonder.
Without it, I would be small.

We will wait.
This world contains tiny packets of the future: good.
But we long, hope, and are destined for so much more.

Thursday, June 12, 2008


Are you a photocopy of someone else?
Do you constantly watch other people and mimic?
Do you have any idea who you are, or do you let other people define you?

Our generation is one of trends.
Very few people are trendsetters;
Most are followers.

And not everyone can be first to a new idea...
But everyone IS unique.
I think that many of us tend to forget that to look different is to be beautiful.

To know who you are,
To love who you are,
To be confident in who you are,
Especially in the face of conflict or adversity?

That is...

That. is. Freedom.

Toss off those chains,
Because a copy of a copy of a copy of a copy
Tends to be too blurry.
Or look like Bill Murray.

(FYI: That was a completely unintentional rhyme. But it works.)

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

What dolphins teach us about love...

One recent evening, after seeing OneRepublic in concert, I had an interesting conversation with my girl friends. Somehow, we were on the topic of their experiences in swimming with dolphins.

I can't personally relate to this, as I've never done it. Nonetheless, some eyebrow-raising judgments arose from these stories. Well, their eyebrows rose - it made perfect sense to me.

Leslie swam with dolphins in the Keys. She said they were incredibly friendly and loving. The entire experience was just as she expected - as I think we all expect. You know, riding around on the back of a dolphin with our arms spread wide, our thighs held tight and a super-fake-movie smile plastered on our faces.

That type of happy.

Melissa, on the other hand, had a rougher experience in swimming with Dolphins in Tanzania. While on a business trip (I think), she decided that she wanted to experience the love of dolphins as well.

But... instead the dolphins were rough. I remember her saying something along the lines of, "I expected to be grabbing on to their fins and being whisked around while they swam. But it was more like trying to grab onto them as they swam by at lightning fast speeds. They weren't easy to catch and they weren't as friendly as they are typically portrayed."

My immediate comments were regarding romanticized love. I think this stemmed from the fact that we have had several conversations about my cynicism since Leslie moved in, specifically surrounding chick flicks. I, as a general rule, detest chick flicks because they set up such unreal expectations for women in regard to love.

Life doesn't end happily ever after. (I mean seriously, even in Enchanted - in which Disney makes fun of itself and its illogical ideas - the FREAKING MOVIE ENDS HAPPILY EVER AFTER!)

And you can argue, if you like, that it's just a story or just a movie: But I swear to you, these ideas get embedded in our minds as women. And when 'real' men don't add up, it certainly causes some type of tension.

Just a closing thought about chick flicks: I think they depress me because they give me this idea that my life sucks because it isn't like that pretty girl's life in the movie. Maybe I should know better - that this is mere fiction - but it doesn't sit that way with my soul.

So, back to the dolphins. 

I found it entertaining (and lucky for me, quite fitting for my cynicism) that the American dolphins were the fun, friendly, lovey-dovey dolphins, while the African dolphins were not. My exact words were, "American dolphins represent chick flicks and American ideas of love. The African dolphins - now that's the real world." 

Consider the parallel. You walk away from your American experience feeling in love and great about yourself. The animals are so lovely and loving and sweet and probably even gave you a kiss on the way out. Just as their way of saying, goodnight. Oh, and thanks for coming.

Melissa, in her African experience, was reminded that things are not always as they seem. In real life, people are too busy for each other (a sad truth). They rush by each other, forgetting to invest daily in their relationship. In real life, people are portrayed as one thing, but often end up being something else. To be honest, that's true for love, too. America has built up this idea of what love should look like, but to be certain - it's only infatuation. We have a severe problem with this infatuation. When things eventually settle down into the opportunity for true, unselfish love - people run. That type of love is just scary. And hard. And selfless. 

Most people don't want to invest. 

Thus, my synopsis is this: if you want a glimpse of the real world and feisty dolphins, go to Africa. If you like chick flicks and happy-go-lucky dolphins, stay in America.

(Disclaimer: if you don't know me well, I was laughing hysterically as this came to pass. I certainly, at least halfheartedly, meant part of what I was saying. But it was also in jest.)

Monday, June 9, 2008

Looking backwards through a kaleidoscope.


We often turn it around, seeing things only from our own angle.

But we are the ones who abandon.
Running into our 'freedom'.

Oh, 'freedom' - it ain't so free after all!

Issues with authority.
Self sufficiency.
We are quite brilliant.

Or so we think.
"Can anyone really know what's best for me, other than me?"
Our warped mindset is at least somewhat the result of our bizarre society.

I find it humourous that we consider God's Kingdom 'backwards.'
Rather, it surely must be the other way around!


About Me

My photo
I live amongst the dragons and the warriors of the 21st century. I surround myself with both the peasants, the aristocrats; the knights and the maidens. For a long time (now quite in the past), I wove the structure of my life around the mold others saw for me. I've since learned to live for God and myself. Freedom comes and goes as I remember this lesson of mine. But my life is MY life: a series of events and remembering such. And this, this beautiful montage, is why I wake up every morning. God willing.